Disclaimer: J/C aren't mine. Yadda yadda yadda.
A/N: Written for VAMB's Secret Drabble exchange. My recipient, Ymwelwr, gave the prompt; First sentence: And then they had sex.
This story can also be found on ffnet.
And then they had sex. The End. Chakotay read the last few words to himself off the PADD, not really focusing on them. He had worked a double shift and all he wanted to do was curl up and sleep, but Kathryn had been beyond livid when she had handed the PADD to him… well, she hadn’t exactly handed it to him, maybe tossed at him was a better way of describing how it came to be in his possession.
“I don’t get it, Kathryn,” he really didn’t. “We know that the crew sometimes uses writing as an escape from the everyday out here. We’ve agreed that it’s definitely a healthier avenue than, I don’t know, jousting or leola-root bake offs. This definitely isn’t the first time we’ve found ourselves as characters in one such story, why is this one upsetting you so much?”
At first she just stared at him. Then with a huff after realizing that he really wasn’t going to get it, she pointed to the offending five words that finished the story.
“And then they had—you’re mad that they implied that we’re having sex? Kathryn…we are having sex. Well, not at this moment but you know what I mean.” She didn’t reply, so he rationalized that thought aloud to himself. “No…that can’t be it, because this story is a hell of a lot tamer than the last one we found.”
He thought for another second and an idea hit him like a ton of dilithium crystals. “You’re mad that the author didn’t write the actual sex?”
Kathryn remained quiet. “That’s it isn’t it?”
She glared at him, but by the twinkle in her eyes, he knew that he’d come to the right conclusion.
As his smile got bigger, she masked her own with annoyance. “You can’t end a story with ‘And then they had sex’ any more than you can begin one with it! It’s just so…so--” she struggled to find the right word to finish her thought.
“So what?” he asked, still smiling from ear to ear.
“So—I don’t know!” she growled in frustration as she slammed her head back onto a pillow.
“It’s obviously something, Kathryn, so spill.”
“Fine! It’s just…well, we haven’t had time for certain things recently.” They hadn’t. They’d spent the last two weeks on opposite shifts and whenever they had any time together, one of them or both of them were too tired to eat, let alone have sex.
“I was hoping this story would have been as…satisfying as the last one.” Boy had the last one been satisfying. She had initially been given the PADD by Tuvok under the pretense that it was an ill-advised use of crew time and against moral code to use real people for such practices. She’d been outraged at first that she and Chakotay were the protagonists in what was probably the smuttiest thing she’d ever read, but heavens was she turned on. That evening, she and Chakotay never left the bedroom.
She’d acquired this new PADD during Alpha shift, and had saved it all day for bedtime reading knowing that he was working a double and would probably be exhausted by the end of the day. All she really wanted was to do was have sex with her boyfriend, but barring that, she would settle for reading a hot story in which she could just imagine she had.
“Chakotay,” she trailed her fingers up his chest, “I miss you.”
“I’m sorry, Kathryn. I do understand and I miss you too.” He ran his hand through her hair and leaned in to kiss her. “You know what?” he asked against her lips.
“I think I have a solution!”
“Oh?” She smiled and propped her chin up on the arm that had just been on his chest to look at him, before asking, “You do?”
Now his eyes were shining with the glint of the devil. “I do,” he affirmed. “From the electronic signature on this PADD and the sticky grape jelly fingerprints,” spirits did he hope that was grape jelly, “it appears the writer was Crewman Chell.”
“Chell?” Boy did that kill the mood. She really hadn’t wanted to focus a great deal on who had been thinking so much about their sex life, let alone writing stories about it.
“Yes. See right here?” he pointed to the code that was unique to the Bolian crewman. “I figure we can sort this out right now.”
“I’ll call him up here so he can finish the story aloud for us in graphic detail.”
Kathryn buried her head under her pillow.
“Well, then there isn’t anything we can do, so we should just call it a night.”
“Oh, no,” Kathryn replied sitting back up on the bed.
“There’s another alternative… one that I like much better.”
“Oh?” he smiled, suddenly not so tired anymore.
“We finish the story ourselves…in graphic detail,” she replied as she pushed him down onto his side of the bed.
And then they had sex.